Okay… So I guess I don’t HATE my body, as opposed to just hating the reproductive organs that come along with it. Okay… I guess I don’t officially hate them either, considering they have assisted in the creation and birth of my two daughters. So really, I don’t HATE them as such… but I DO have serious issue with them- especially the left ovary and fallopian tube! I DO have issue with the chronic pain I have lived with for 5 LOOOONG years now. More particularly, with the severe pain I have experienced probably 50% of the time (for the 5 years) with thanks to ovulation cycles. Similarly, I DO have issue with my fear of leaving the house, knowing that I will get nauseous of the pain. With the moodiness, the highs and lows of emotion, hormonal fluctuations, not to mention the self-doubt my periods have caused… and, of course, the age-old question, “Why is this happening to me?” Damn you!
But, through all of this, what I am thankful for is I’ve FINALLY been able to do something proactive about it. It’s been a long, long, road but it seems the light at the end of my tunnel has been reached.
Ever having Khloe 5 years ago it has been a super bumpy ride. After the third cycle I realized something was not quite right. Did a laparoscopy. Fixed it. Then it decided to start its endless shit again. Thanks.
And as we already know… hormones and me, well… we just don’t seem to get along.
At age 31, after years of suspected endometriosis and trips to the specialist, I went in for a routine pap smear only to find out Mrs Left Ovary had develop cysts and they are booking me for yet another lovely surgery. I had putting off going to the doctor literally for 2 years due to my fear of needles and hospitals. Needless to say, now I simply did not have a choice in the matter. So a week after said sad little visit, I was in hospital having the procedure performed for the cysts, a laparoscopy for the suspected endometriosis, and a hysteroscopy to determine any uterine damage or effects on my fertility (which is nonexistent anyways).
Fortunately my results were good with successful removal of the cysts. I had numerous scarring deposits (which were expected), with the worst being external to my uterus taking up residency and causing adhesion’s between my uterus and my best friend, the left ovary.
All endometriosis was removed and the hysteroscopy showed positive results with regard to the healing of my womb after the second c-section. All in all, I guess you could say it was a very productive day at the office for my doctor and anesthetist (and for me too).
A common myth surrounding endometriosis is that it can be improved by having children… “It’ll get better once you have kids”, people would always say. Um, unfortunately not. After the birth of Khloe, and then again after Zoe, my periods only worsened. The endometriosis started AFTER having Khloe- weirdly enough.
The ovulation pain was equally as intense as it was debilitating, lasting for nearly 4 days of every month. My period pain would last over 48 long hours (again, debilitating). When I realised things were again getting worse after Zoe’s birth, I decided to go and see my doctor (OBGYN who delivered Zoe) about putting a stop to this nonsense once and for all.
His question to me was very simple: “Do you want to have any more children?” Having always known Zoe would be our last, it was an easy reply: “No.” And with that, we discussed my options. I knew I didn’t want a hysterectomy at this stage in life, so we talked through other procedures that may help ease the intensity of my symptoms. After only half an hour of discussion, my mind was made up and we had scheduled my surgery date for today, the 10th of April. I just needed this pain to be over and my quality of life back. I was booked in for a diagnostic laparoscopy to remove any new deposits of endometriosis, an endometrial ablation to alleviate the heaviness of my bleeding, a d&C as well as a laparoscopy to remove the cysts and quick fix the left ovary. It was a full system overhaul!
So now I am going back next week Thursday to discuss further options. It would most probably include the removal of the left ovary as well as the fallopian tube.
Thanks very much for taking the time to read this post, particularly if you are also struggling with endometriosis. I feel very lucky to have had such a positive result when I am well aware many women are not as fortunate. Endometriosis is a nasty and debilitating condition, and it’s something we as women should be speaking about more often. As they say, awareness is key…